Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Friday, December 21, 2007

Willard Tortures English

"I'm an English literature major," he added, after the questions didn't stop. "When we say I saw the Patriots win the World Series, it doesn't necessarily mean you were there."

For crying out loud. I've got a better idea, Willard: If you are going to torture the English language to get the meaning that you want, why not write a fifty-page thesis on what the meaning of "is" is?

Here is a bit of free legal advice, Willard: If you ever get up on a witness stand and say "I saw him do it" and then it turns out that you weren't there and you didn't see him with your own eyeballs, there are two other words you should be prepared to give a discourse on: Lying and perjury.

Yes, it is true that when you say "I saw what he meant", you're not talking about vision. That use of the verb has to do with mental constructs, ideas, and knowledge of facts. "I see that the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor" means that I learned that fact. "I saw the Japanese bomb Pearl Harbor" means that I am claiming to have been present for the event.

Willard obviously slept through his classes if he is trying to hang his hat on that distinction. And he is patently assuming that most Republican voters are complete idiots. But then again, since the Republicans chose Bush, the latter assumption may be a valid one.

Beyond that, this moron was the Governor of Massachusetts. The only way he could have ever seen the "Patriots win the World Series" would be if he was doing LSD at the time.

2 comments:

Justin Buist said...

Beyond that, this moron was the Governor of Massachusetts. The only way he could have ever seen the "Patriots win the World Series" would be if he was doing LSD at the time.

Speaking as a Republican, "I was on LSD the entire time!" is about the only possible defense of his goverorship.

To me the only difference between him and Hillary is I'd let Mitt handle my retirement account. Not as an elected official, mind you, but to use my money as he does his in investments.

Lurch said...

As an aside, completely off-topic, the History International Channel will show an episode of "Young Indiana Jones" on Sunday at 10 AM. This is a pretty interesting one.

The basic gimmick of the series is that he rubs shoulders with a lot of later-famous people while growing up,(i.e. Ho Chi Minh in Paris, 1919.)

In this one he meets Degas, Picasso and Norman Rockwell.