Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Post-Holiday Musings

I felt pretty good about my holiday gift shopping. For one thing, I was able to avoid going to a shopping mall. Between the insanity of parking and the huge crowds, I don't want to go to the mall unless I can install one of these on my car:


I made the mistake one year, many, many years ago, of going to the mall on the day after Thanksgiving. It was a bit of a schlep to get there, I had a cup of Dunkin's finest with me to fortify me on the drive. After I arrived at the Gates of Hell Mall, I found one parking space after cruising around the parking lot and I and walked to the entrance. On the way there, I saw a cream-colored BMW that some putz had parked cater-corner across two parking spaces so nobody could ding his precious widdle Beemer.

I took my cup of coffee (cream, no sugar) and poured it lovingly over the windshield and hood of that car. Then I set the cup on the roof of the car. When I came out of the mall 90 minutes later with my swag, the cup was still there. And it had been joined by two others and it appeared that their contents had also been poured over the BMW.

(Hey, at least I didn't key it or smash in the windshield.)

I was given a Bugs Bunny action figure with an Acme anvil-shooting gun.

The anvil gun is a big hit with George. If I flick my wrist as I fire the anvil gun, the anvil travels for about four feet; George pounces on it and baps it around.

I was also given a DVD of V for Vendetta. I've watched a couple of the special features, but not the DVD of the movie yet.

Oops, here's George. Time to shoot off an anvil.

2 comments:

Lurch said...

Anvil shooting is great fun. Did you know there is an anvil-shooting contest each year in Laurel, MS?

Comrade Misfit said...

Lurch, I had no idea. But wouldn't that more appropriately be "anvil blasting?"