Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Friday, February 19, 2010

Why Folks Think That "Federal Official" is Another Way of Saying "As Dumb As a Bag of Hammers"

Stupid comments such at this will do it:
The pilot of a small plane that slammed into a building Thursday morning in Austin, Texas, set his house on fire beforehand and then intentionally crashed the aircraft, a federal official told CNN.
No fucking shit, Inspector Closeau, what was your first clue? The multi-page screed/manifesto that the pilot posted on the Internet before he first torched his own home and then flew his airplane into the IRS's offices? Or was it the fact that, by all accounts, the airplane was on a controlled and deliberate track when it slammed into that office building at full throttle?

By the Jeebus, does that unnamed "Federal official" require help in order to feed himself? Can he wipe his (or her) own ass without a ten-page instruction manual? Does each morning's sunrise come as a complete surprise to Mr. or Ms. Fed?

I once had the "pleasure" of taking a class from a college professor who would ask students who didn't want to speak in class if they preferred to keep silent and be surmised a fool or speak and remove all doubt about the question.

The "unnamed Federal officials" who always talk after such incidents ought to keep that in mind.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, and the FBI profiled the guy after the fact and talk about it being obvious he had been in pain and rage for years...so what, that makes it less criminal? Wow. Frakking Ballbusting Imbeciles strike again. Who twists arms to make them say such stupid shit?

BadTux said...

Having been in somewhat the same situation as said "federal official" in the past except not as an employee of the government, what I can say is that with our current retarded news media, it's a no-win situation. There was fuckall that this dude could actually say to the media that wasn't immediately and stupidly obvious, but if he hadn't stated the immediate and stupidly obvious, the media would have hounded him with claims of a "coverup" and shit like that. So he says the stupidly obvious, the media dutifully falls upon it and devours it like the pack of dumbasses that they are, he goes back behind the stage, and wipes the sweat off his face that now those fucking idiots are out of his hair for a while.

You want to change that, do something about the culture of stupidity that is our so-called media. The odd part is that individually, many reporters you talk to one on one actually aren't cretins and morons. But you put two or more reporters into one place and call it a "press conference", it's as if their collective IQ went down to below the level of a Bush Administration political appointee. And that's pretty fucking dumb.

- Badtux the Pressed Penguin

Comrade Misfit said...

It is an axiom of meetings that you can divide the average IQ of the attendees by the number of attendees in order to determine how useful the meeting will be. There is even a demotivational poster about it.