Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Monday, November 16, 2009

"The Penultimate Journey to Shore Up the International Space Station"

Really. Some public relations weenie at NASA wrote that, some pointy-haired manager approved that, and some jerkwater announcer read it. It comes about 1:45 into this video of the launch. Then, a minute later, the clown at the mike says something about the crew "kicking off their work week with a Monday commute to orbit."



Can you imagine the NASA folks in the 1960s saying some crap like that about an Apollo moonshot? I can't.

NASA, just STFU. Really. Shut up.


The Shuttle is carrying about 13 tons of stuff and six astronauts to the ISS. That's pretty spectacular enough without having to dress it up with "let's reach for the thesaurus and find adjectives we haven't used" type of writing.

Oh, and one last slam: Rockets do not "go uphill", you fucking morons.

3 comments:

Sarah said...

Yeah. Sigh. They try to make it all workmanlike & ordinary and kill the wonder. A simple "godspeed Atlantis" would be better.

I hereby vow to attend the ultimate shuttle launch. I've never seen one, and it'll be a long long time until the next one.


She packed my bags last night pre-flight
Zero hour nine a.m.
And I'm gonna be high as a kite by then
I miss the earth so much I miss my wife
It's lonely out in space
On such a timeless flight
And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone
Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids
In fact it's cold as hell
And there's no one there to raise them if you did
And all this science I don't understand
It's just my job five days a week
A rocket man, a rocket man
And I think it's gonna be a long long time...

Eck! said...

It's that kind of blather that give everyone the impression this is simple and safe.. Theres a million pounds of high explosive if things go wrong under them. It's still dangerous and has real risk. with that kind of crud speak if something bad happens everyone has forgotten those that do it are taking serious risk for science and exploration.

Just dumb really dumb.

Eck!

Cujo359 said...

Classic NASA-speak was understated, and I agree that's how it works best. It's actually exciting that the ISS is big enough now to accommodate six crew plus the shuttle. That's more than we've ever had before, I think.