Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Saturday, March 26, 2016

Those Arresting Physicists

From a joke that;s going around:
Werner Heisenberg, Erwin Schrodinger and Georg Ohm are in a car that gets pulled over. Heisenberg is driving and the cop asks him: "Do you know how fast you were going?"

"No, but I know exactly where I am," Heisenberg replies.

The cop says: "You were doing 55 in a 35."

Heisenberg throws up his hands and shouts: "Great! Now I'm lost!"

The cop thinks this is suspicious and orders him to pop open the trunk. He checks it out and says: "Do you know you have a dead cat back here?"

"We do now, you jerk!" shouts Schrodinger.

The cop moves to arrest them. Ohm resists.

4 comments:

Murphy's Law said...

Groan x3.

Leo Knight said...

I laughed until I got the hiccups.

w3ski said...

"Ohhhhhmmmmmmmmmmm" New Meditation mantra for engineers.

Dark Avenger said...

"Erwin, what the devil did you do to the cat? The poor thing looks half-dead!"