Orange Felon Can't Tell Me What to Do

Words of Advice:

DONALD TRUMP IS A CONVICTED FELON. CASE CLOSED.

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- Trump

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Never Get Into Anything With a 'Jesus Nut'." -- every fixed-wing pilot

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

Karma may sometimes be late to arrive.
But it never loses an address.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

What the Hell, It Didn't Work For Blackwater

As everyone must know by now, in an attempt to escape their reputation as a bunch of over-paid, trigger-happy, kiddie-shooting mercenaries, Blackwater Worldwide ThugCo changed their name to "Xe Services."

It didn't work. Everybody and their dog still calls them "Blackwater".

So, with that massive fail in mind, Comcast decided to change its name to "Xfinity", because nothings says "we are a company that everybody hates" like adopting a new name that begins with the letter "X". In a stunning lack of sense, ComBastards now also refers to themselves as "XF", which is probably fitting as they are one extremely fucked up entity.

I don't know what Comcast is trying to pull off. They could change their name to the "Mother Theresa and Her Adorable Puppies Cable Company" and everybody would still hate them.

3 comments:

Cujo359 said...

They sucked when they were TCI, and they'll probably still suck as Xfiniti. In another decade or so, they'll change their names again. Some traditions are truly timeless.

BadTux said...

You're a company in trouble? Bad rep got you down? X it out!

Next up: Dick Cheney changes his name to Xander Xavier. Alrighty, then ;).

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Nangleator said...

Hi! I'm a drive by representative to say smiley things about not sucking! For your convenience!

Except, we do suck, otherwise we wouldn't need to pay people like me!