Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Friday, March 19, 2010

Headlines

From the Ironic Times:
Supreme Court Upholds “Under God” in Pledge of Allegiance
Drops “with liberty and justice for all.”

GERMAN CHURCH ABUSE CASE CLOSING IN ON POPE

Tells crowd in St. Peter's Square, “Ego mos nunquam capimini dum ego sum victus” (“They'll never take me alive!”)

Conservatives on Texas School Board Approve New History Curriculum
Lone Star State third graders will soon learn about American heroes Father Coughlin, Joe McCarthy and present-day heroine Ann Coulter.

Limbaugh: If Health Reform Passes "I'll Move to Costa Rica"
Where he can be treated for an occasional OxyContin overdose by their highly regarded government-run health system.

2 comments:

SkinnyDennis said...

GERMAN CHURCH ABUSE CASE CLOSING IN ON POPE

What happened to
"I vas only phallowing orders" ?

Marc said...

The Onion Has The Latest:

http://tinyurl.com/ydl4xs8