Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Monday, July 14, 2008

An Industry of Whiners

That would be the airline industry. Flight delays are blamed on corporate jets. Increased costs are blamed on oil speculators. Nothing new here, it wasn't long ago that they were blaming their unions.

I realize that airlines have lots of MBAs running things, which is one of the reason why they are perennially in trouble. So let me make it simple for those folks, as I am assuming that my regular readers know this.

Airlines, like all businesses, have their costs. Their income comes from carrying passengers and cargo. You can make a basic T diagram by listing costs in one column and income in the other.

Costs --- Income

You then add them up and, if income is higher, you're making money. If costs are higher, you're in trouble.

So, if you have cut costs on your flights as much as you can, then your choices are to start cutting flights themselves so you fill more seats on each flight. If you then have over 95% of your seats full on each flight and you are still not making a profit on your flights, then your choice is glaringly simple: Raise your fucking fares, guys.

It's either that or you can go out of business. Like lots of small and medium size businesses do, every day. Cheap airline travel is not a right guaranteed by the Flying Spaghetti Monster or the Constitution. If anything, the current policy of the airlines, which is to keep fares low and then charge for every fucking little thing, is just pissing off your customers. The airline industry is becoming a joke; any business with which the airlines are compared favorably knows it is in trouble.

Airlines, you're a service business, not a livestock hauler, nor are you transporting convicts to Australia. Break the code or go out of business. You have no more right to stay in business than the local tavern and, to be frank about it, you get better service and a more enjoyable time at a tavern.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh. My. God. The Flying Spaghetti Monster had flip-flopped.

Anonymous said...

My word. They should have their bonuses yanked for all the whining.

I love how they're cutting service and nickling and diming their passengers.

deadstick said...

That's not fair. The Flying Spaghetti Monster could give us cheap airline transportation, but the damn left-wing public schools just won't let us teach the power of His Noodliness.

BobG said...

Personally, I refuse to fly unless I absolutely have to. I would rather drive for hours than get on one of those things; jails are run better, more politely, and more comfortably than the commercial airlines.

Comrade Misfit said...

Bob, oh, I agree. My sister flies commercial, because with two small curtain-climbers, it is less agonizing to fly than to spend the better part of two days in a car.

But as for me, if I can't drive, I'm not going. Amtrak's on-time performance is so poor that they count arriving within 24 hours of the scheduled time to be good (kidding, sort of).