Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Monday, July 27, 2015

Fer Cryssake, Just Shoot the Fucker

Some folks at a website called "SimpliSafe Security Systems" have some advice about what to do if you are the victim of a home invasion.

Some of it is good. Some of it will get you killed.

Locking yourself in an interior room or a closet: Not much better than using a SuperSoaker as a defensive tool. Not unless you've shelled out the money to install a secure door. Interior doors are mostly hollow-core doors that can be shattered by one or two good kicks. Or, if the perp is really determined, he'll kick a few holes in the adjoining sheetrock.

Beeping on your car's panic alarm: Mostly a dumb idea. Car alarms are background noise in most places. The frequency of false alarms is so high that everyone ignores them. Also, if you're living in an apartment complex, who the hell is going to connect the alarm of a 2008 Taurus sounding in the parking lot? If you live in a house and your car is in the garage, well, that's not going to help much.

Guy breaks into your home: Shoot the fucker. Call 911.*

As for your cell phone? If you can't speak into it, how long do you think it'll take for them to get a location? And how good will that be if you're in a multi-story apartment building? Get a landline- pick up the phone, dial 911 and if you can't speak, kick the handset under your bed.

(And no, that's not legal advice.)
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* In the UK, call 999 or 112, hide, and sound your rape alarm.

3 comments:

Old NFO said...

Agreed! MUCH better advice, and a POTS line is excellent for that!

CenterPuke88 said...

Can we add, don't go looking to "clear" the house unless it's absolutely necessary. If you are able to, hole-up in a nice defensible position with 911 on the phone and a firearm in your possession, locked and loaded. Given today's police, I prefer the idea of being able to talk on the phone so you know when the police are there, cause you unload on a cop coming in that door, it'll likely turn into a cheap version of the Breaking Bad finale.

Joe said...

My brother the cop says preventing home invasions is better than any of these techniques. And you can prevent 99.9% of home invasions by not dealing drugs.

And "brava!" to the lady in WV. Shooting an attacker with his own gun takes the kind of presence of mind that I can only wish I had.