Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Monday, February 9, 2015

Remington is Doomed

No, I'm not talking about their killing off the Para USA brand. I'm talking about them using buzzwords such as this:
In 2014, [Remington] announced its new, world-class firearms center of excellence in Huntsville, Alabama.
That's a lot of MBA-speak buzzwords packed into a single sentence.

But that's what happens when the MBAs and the beancounters take over. The MBAs put out bullshit press releases. The beancounters try to squeeze every nickel out of the process.

There was a time when companies just made good shit. Because they were run by engineers, not MBAs.[1] A true engineer-run company would make a product that was good, then they'd say, "hey, we make some good shit, here!"

But no, not an MBA. An MBA starts babbling about a "world-class center of excellence" before the cement trucks have poured the fucking floor to the factory, years before the first widget has made it to the end of the production line.

It is my humble opinion, Gentle Reader, that this country began its long slog to mediocrity when the first Ivy-league MBA school[2] opened its doors. Because that's when people began to think that management was something that can be learned in a classroom, not on a production floor. That's when people began to think that you didn't have to know anything about how your product was made to run the company.

We'd have been better off if, in 1908, TR had sent some heavy artillery to Cambridge and reduced Harvard's new business school to rubble.[3]
___________________________________________
[1] Or accountants.
[2] Notable graduates include Willard M. Romney and George W. Bush.
[3] "Better late than never."

2 comments:

Expatriate Owl said...

There are two kinds of MBAs. The ones who follow the scripts in their MBA school textbooks, and the ones such as myself who use their brains and learn from the real world.

When I was about a year into my MBA (I went at night because I had a day job getting my hands dirty at the time), I was at a party, and got into a little difference of opinion with someone who had gotten his MBA from a big name biz school.

I was in production at the time, and spent most of my working hours on the floor of the factory production area.

The boss's son had once again gotten up on his high horse, and the shop steward and two other production workers made contingency plans to get up and walk off the job. I had heard the conversation.

The shop steward saw me walk by, and said to me, "Hey, Owl, how far behind schedule will you be if we don't clock in again after lunch?"

Everyone laughed.

I recounted the incident/ Mr. Snotnose MBA indignantly told me that I worked for management, and had the obligation to inform Management about the plans to walk off the job.

Yes, that is consistent with the textbook, but if I ever were to snitch on the production guys, then they would make sure that I never again learned any relevant information to do my job.

As matters stood, I knew, albeit unofficially, who was going to call in sick the next day (from their house down the shore), who was looking elsewhere for a job, and who was in bed with whose wife. I accordingly was able to plan the production schedule quite well. And I knew because the guys on the shop floor made it their business to leak vital info to me.



John G. said...

I worked for Chrysler Corp for 23 years and the prevailing opinion of management was that a manager didn't need to know anything about what you do to manage effectively. You can see how that turned out.