Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

"Mobs Do Not Storm the Capitol to Do Good Deeds." -- not James Lee Burke

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys underground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"Let’s eat all of these people!” — Venom

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

Truth in Humor

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Sharing helpful health tips with the American people, Senator Rand Paul said on Wednesday that the secret to social distancing is making everyone despise you.

“People get all worried about whether other people are staying six feet away from them,” Paul said. “The trick is, if you act like a total jerkwad, people will stay much farther away from you than that.”
Sort of like I said elsewhere, incels are guys who use their personalities as a method of birth-control.

The only people who want to get close to Rand Paul are those who would like to punch him out.


Doug T. said...

Borowitz on Susan Collins


Ten Bears said...

Has it reproduced? Is it a candidate for a Darwin Award?

Glen Filthie said...


I understand the shitlibs are currently trying to organize a hierarchy of their preferred victim groups and formalize it under a framework called “intersectionality”. Lesbians, feminists, faggots, wahmen and other unsavoury degenerates pose as intellectuals as they try to figure out which fake victim groups belong at the top, and which belong at the bottom. Of course they can’t agree because all the participants think they should be at the top. Are you familiar with it Comrade? I imagine you’d place the dykes at the top, and incels at the bottom?

I’m a big fan of Xirl Science and all the comedy that goes along with it. You should try it... it would be a good fit for your talents. ☺️👍

dinthebeast said...

Rand fucking Paul had the virus. Even his massive despicability didn't protect him.

-Doug in Sugar Pine

Eck! said...

Looked up GF in snopes:

Might be human, Low intelligence, eats lint.

Nothing to see here folks.


DTWND said...

My brother posed this situation to me.

Next time you go into work, walk up to a black co-worker and tell them to "Go back and help fix the totally broken and crime infested places from which they came." Next, go to a handicapped co-worker and mock how they move, talk, and act. Then go to a female co-worker and just start kissing them and grab them by the p*ssy. Next, go to another worker and create a name to berate them for their looks or the way their clothes look or their haircut or some other idiosyncrasy. Let's see if you still have a job by noon.

Do the same actions in your personal life. Complete the same behavior towards you neighbors, your relatives, your friends, your family. Let's see if anyone wants to interact with you afterward.

Now we all know that we won't do those scenarios. And why? Because its wrong. It is poor behavior. So if it is wrong for us citizens, why should we tolerate the behavior in the President of the United States? If you do, you're no better than the trash that currently resides in the White House. Which makes you a hypocrite.


Ten Bears said...

That, Dale, and the fact that people like me are not unwilling to beat the living shit out of people like that. Spit on me I'll rip their fucking heads off. I'm actually looking forward to this civil war thing, I haven't had a real, honest-to-goodness fight in forty years.

But then again, there's no sport in beating up dumbass drugged-out drunks.

Antibubba said...

Maybe Rand can get tips from Ted Cruz.