Everything Trump Touches Turns Into Shit. Everything.

After all the drama related to United States President Donald Trump and his apparent role in USMNT striker Folarin Balogun gaining eligibility to play in Monday night's match against Belgium, it was ultimately Belgium who got the last laugh on Monday at Trump's expense.

After their final goal of the 4-1 victory over the United States, some Belgium players were seen collectively mocking Trumpas they celeb rated both the goal and the blowout victory over the United States.

Anyone doubt that the Belgian players were fired up by Trump's trying to do a little bit of cheating?

Overturn this. 🧏‍♂️ #USABEL pic.twitter.com/KcBAJp3Z7d

— Belgian Red Devils (@BelRedDevils) July 7, 2026

Trump indeed is Reverse King Midas.

Trump Cheats at Everything

He leaned on FIFA to bend the rules on red card suspensions.

The White House made a call to FIFA to ask Gianni Infantino to review Folarin Balogun’s red card, according to a person familiar with the call who spoke on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to speak publicly about the matter.
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Trump celebrated the red card reversal shortly after it was announced, posting on his social media network “Thank you to FIFA for doing what was right, and reversing a great injustice!”

If the American team advances, everyone else around the world will be convinced that Trump got FIFA to bend the rules and that's the only reason the USMST wasn't beaten like a gong. All of its wins will be tainted.

Because everything Trump touches turns to shit.

No Corruption or Self-Dealing Here, Nosiree

Imagine spending the day getting punched in the head on the White House lawn and then find yout you're getting paid in a bullshit crypto currency.

Sadly, that's the reality for the fools participating on Donnie's gladiatorial match:

The Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC) announced on Friday that it will pay bonuses to fighters in a form of cryptocurrency issued by Trump family business World Liberty Financial at the heavily publicized White House mixed martial arts event on Sunday.

The development connects the Trump family’s financial interests to the high-profile UFC competition being promoted on government property. The competition on the south White House lawn is scheduled for 14 June, Donald Trump’s birthday.

The UFC said some fighters will receive bonuses in World Liberty Financial crypto called “stablecoins”, whose value is pegged to the US dollar. World Liberty named the currency “USD1”.

Every freaking day, there is some corrupt fuckery from this administration that, back in the day, would end a career. But with these birds, everyone shrugs at his raking in graft with both of his tiny hands and just drives on.

JEFF-REY EP-STEIN! clap-clap clap-clap-clap

If the Knicks fans don't do that when Trump is at Game 3, then shame on them.

Half Time

Someone just called the TPUSA halftime show “Klanchella”.

Dumbasses Rule

The head coach of the Portland Trail Blazers and a player for the Miami Heat were arrested Thursday along with more than 30 other people in a takedown of two sprawling gambling operations that authorities said leaked inside information about NBA athletes and rigged poker games backed by Mafia families.

Anybody in the world of sports who did not see this coming the moment the powers that be started talking about legalizing sports betting has rocks for brains. Point-shaving has been going on in basketball for generations, baseball games have been fixed by gamblers since the Civil War. When sports betting and all of the attendant prop bets were legalized, it was just a matter of time until players and coaches got caught up in fixing games.

Melt Down the Umpire! Melt Down the Umpire!

Robot umpires are getting called up to the big leagues next season.

It's not quite a full replacement of the umpires, but make no mistake about it, we are getting there.

Can't Upset the Demented Fuhrer of Orange, Mustn't We.

An internal email sent by the U.S. Tennis Association leadership to U.S. Open broadcasters, obtained by Bounces, requested that broadcasters censor any possible protests or other reactions to President Donald Trump’s presence at Sunday’s U.S. Open men’s final between Jannik Sinner and Carlos Alcaraz.

Mustn't hurt his feewings, because everyone knows how angry the World's Oldest and Orangist Toddler gets when people refer to him as the utter fascist Russian-agent asshole that he is.

Trump Administration and Little Marco Are Nothing But Petty-Ass Pissants

Denying visas to a team of Little-Leaguers is about as petty as it gets.

A Venezuelan Little League baseball team will not be allowed to participate in a championship tournament because the team was denied travel visas to the U.S.

Little League International said on Friday the Cacique Mara Little League team from Maracaibo, Venezuela will not participate in the Senior League Baseball World Series in South Carolina this year, despite qualifying for the tournament, after being unable to obtain visas.

Yeah, that made all sorts of diplomatic and political sense to carry out the Senile Orange Turd's diplomatic war on a bunch of kids. It'll echo around the world as yet another example of how small-minded the Trump Administration is.

Cleveland: Dumb Then, Dumb Now

Cleveland is fighting over the NFL Browns's desire to leave the city for a proposed domed stadium in the 'burbs.

There was no shortage of people, at the time, who thought that the city was dumb as a truck of rocks for a) spend a third of a billion, in 1998 dollars, to build a stadium for a football team; and b) for making it an open-air stadium right next to Lake Erie. So they will, in the end, be stuck with a large lemon on the lake because some goddamned billionaire who could pay for a new stadium out of his pocket change wants a shiny new stadium so he can lord it over the other pro-team-owning billionaires.

Tax the motherfucking billionaires, AKA the Parasitic Class,

OooohKaaaaayyy

Playing football on an ice rink is a thing in Germany.

They Sucked. They Really Sucked.

The Chicago White Sox, which managed to lose 121 games this season.

They had a ways to go to dethrone the Cleveland Spiders as the worst team ever in baseball, but still, being the worst team since the turn of the 20th Century is an impressive feat of awfulness.

There's always next year.

Why is Anyone Shocked That There are Racists in Coeur d’Alene, ID?

Members of the Utah women’s basketball team were subjected to racism near their hotel in Idaho last week when a pickup truck with a Confederate flag drove near them and the driver began using offensive language, including the N-word, authorities said Tuesday. The team was left shaken and wound up moving to a different hotel the next day.
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Tony Stewart, an official with the Kootenai County Task Force on Human Relations, said at a news conference the Utes were walking from the hotel to a restaurant when the truck drove up and the driver began using racist language. After the team left the restaurant, the same driver returned “reinforced by others,” Stewart said, and they revved their engines and again yelled at the players.

People are surprised by this? Coeur d’Alene, and the Idaho panhandle, are known for being a hotbed of racists, white militias and other groupds of hateful nutjobs. All it takes is a whiff of a protest for civil rights and the cranks come out by the hundreds with their guns.

Nobody who is nonwhite, Jewish or non-straight who has an ounce of sense would even think of going there. Somebody at Utah University or the NCAA suffered a major brain fart if they thought it would be a good idea to house Black basketball players in that town.

Remember, Football is Over

Like New Years Eve and St. Patrick's Day are drinking holidays for amateurs, the Super Bowl is a game for people who don't care about football. They're watching for the commercials (the most-hyped part of the game) and the halftime show.

Sadly, This Is Not True

But, just in case....

GO, CHIEFS!

The Vegas Athletics

The Oakland A's are going to move sometime after the 2024 season.

Every current season ticket holder should cancel their tickets for 2024. Any Oakland A's fan who goes to a game next year has no self-respect and should have their heads examined. The Coliseum should be so empty during home games that the team would have to give free tickets to homeless people in order to have anyone in attendance.

World Record Shooting

Six plates in two seconds from the draw with a 9mm revolver.

I need to watch the earlier ones to learn about the gun he's using. One thing of note is the titanium cylinder. Back in the day, match shooters would put titanium cylinders from 325s into 625s, The Ti cylinders have a lot less mass than steel ones, which translates into easier to get going in rotation and a lot less battering of the gun when the cylinder slams into the bolt. His gun is an N-frame with a compensated. The steel-cylinder .357s are known for going out of time if shot a lot and shot fast. A Model 27 with a Titanium cylinder and a 5" or 3.5" barrel would be the shit.

A Little Old Penny-Ante Pissant

Less than 24 hours after the US women’s national team suffered a shocking defeat at the hands of their longtime nemesis Sweden in the second round of the 2023 Women’s World Cup, Donald Trump gloated about the team’s elimination on social media.

The former president, a longtime vocal critic of the team, specifically Megan Rapinoe, a blue-haired talisman and outspoken LGBTQ+ advocate who missed a crucial penalty during the final moments of the game, said that the team’s loss is “fully emblematic of what is happening to our great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden”.

What a no-class petty piece of work to gloat over a team's loss as though it's really any skin off his ass. And, judging from comments that I've deleted, his ardent, wet-brained supporters are just as petty.

But they're just doing what they're told, I gather. If Führer Knochensporne were to put on on his failing social media platform that the sky was green, they'd go around, telling people that the sky was green and they might even challenge to a fight those who disagreed with their cult leader, the Soviet Asset.

Derby Day

This Saturday, full of horses, pomp and circumstance, a tradition partially based on slavery, with lots of mostly white people wearing fancy getups.

There is something similar to that going on in Bloodye Olde Englande on the same day, except for the racing. But, from my perspective, we fought two wars so that we don't have to put up with that shit.

The other day, I walked a forest preserve in southern New England. The land is somewhat hilly, with lots of rock coming through the ground. There are ancient stone walls there, from when the land was farmed. But it got me to thinking: The land was farmed, in part, because the previous inhabitants were all but exterminated in one of the bloodiest wars in American history (going by percentage of the populations killed). After that, those stone-laden fields were farmed by generations of farmers, who endured back-breaking labor to eke out a living from the land. They were as tough as woodpecker lips.

What overfed, sclerotic bureaucrats an ocean away thought that such people would be easily cowed?

Finally, an Honest Guy Standing Outside, Reporting on the Weather

This is what you get when you ask the sports guy to come in to cover a blizzard in the morning show. pic.twitter.com/h0RL9tVQqg

— Mark Woodley (@MarkWoodleyTV) December 22, 2022

I assume this one is going viral. It should.