Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Shorter Hertz: "We're Happy to Ruin Your Once-in-a-Lifetime Trip."

Hertz is canceling reservations that travelers have made for the Great Eclipse of 2017. They say "oops, we overbooked."

So if you've booked a rental car (or anything else, for that matter) to see the eclipse in thirteen days, you might want to confirm it. And find out whose liver you can cut out and feed to a pack of feral dogs, in case they screw you over.

4 comments:

3383 said...

"I know why we have reservations."
"I don't think you do!"

Comrade Misfit said...

I thought the joke was:

"Do you have reservations?"

"Yes, but we're going to rent one of your cars, anyway."

3383 said...

It's from the first Seinfeld scene I related to perfectly.
The problem was weekend renters had not returned the cars, and there was ZERO available for me.

Comrade Misfit said...

3383, that situation was why I eventually gave up and bought my own airplane.