Those New England Pats, Will Cheat on You

The Onion nailed it:

Americans across the nation announced Wednesday that they would love—absolutely love—to hear the excuses from Patriots fans this time. “No, no, by all means, go ahead,” said every single person living outside of Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont, Maine, Rhode Island, and Connecticut before reportedly smiling and adding, “I’m all ears.”

That's a tad bit unfair, for if you're west of the Connecticut River, you're getting into Giants and Jets fan territories.

But only a tad. The rest is spot-on.