Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Friday, January 2, 2015

"Due to Increased Security Measures, Only Ticketed Passengers are Permitted Past Security Checkpoints"

Can we finally can that announcement? Those "increased security measures" have been in place for the last thirteen yeas. By now, they are "normal security measures."

It's become as ridiculous as giving everyone in the military the National Defense Medal, which after twenty-four years of wartime, is somewhat like giving a kid a gold star for showing up in class.

Let's just fucking sack up and admit that those "increased security measures" are never going to go away, just like the blue and green lights on the Stoplight of Death are never going to be lit.

Which reminds me, a shirttail nephew got deployed to one of our war zones recently. I suggested to him and his girlfriend that they stay cool on Skype, since the NSA has a track record of listening into the smutty phone calls of soldiers.

3 comments:

Expatriate Owl said...

Actually, the airlines couldn't be happier.

Many years ago, before the metal detectors, I helped my grandfather board the plane to California by carrying his leg prosthesis up the wheeled staircase onto the plane, as he made his way up using his crutches. After the stewardess placed the prosthesis in the onboard baggage area, I helped Grandpop and Grandmom into their seats and then exited the plane.

Nowadays, because only ticketed passengers can go past the TSA people, passengers with disabilities need to be helped by airline personnel. And eventually, the airlines will charge a fee for this service.

Old NFO said...

Concur with all...

Joe said...

I mentally replace the word "security" with "control" on all airport announcements. Everything is clearer that way.