Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Did You Buy an Off-the Shelf Encryption System?
If You Did, Guess Who Is Reading Your Shit.

The NSA and their British butt-monkeys, the GCHQ. the NSA has managed to gain control of the U.S. encryption standards process to ensure that they have the ability to read your shit.

So all the stuff that the banks tell you that your online banking is secure is a lie. The NSA can go and fuck with your shit any time they want.

All the assurances that your medical records are secure are lies, lies, and more lies. DasGov can go surfing around them any time they feel the urge.

On another note, the MTAHNS is now saying that they are open to the idea of new legislation to try to curb the NSA.

First off, I have zero confidence that the NSA would pay attention. Telling spies that they can listen to X but not Y is like telling a cat that she can claw up your chair, but not your sofa.

Second, it is worth repeating everywhere that none of this discussion, absolutely none of it, would be happening without Ed Snowden having blown his whistle. Much of it has been known for years, but not all of what he has revealed.

You can bet your last paycheck that our spooks would very much like to dump his carcass into an abandoned mineshaft. For he has pulled back the curtain on their rotten edifice of lies and backdoors into systems once thought secure.

3 comments:

Chuck Pergiel said...

MTAHNS?

Comrade Misfit said...

The acronym, defined.

The New York Crank said...

By the way, guys (maybe this is sexist, but I assume it's mostly guys) when you watch Internet porn, it's a fair bet some spook is watching you watch it.

So what? So when they want you to do something nasty, or dangerous, or iffy ("All you have to do for us is, when you're in Paris, is pick up the suitcase and drive it to Zurich" they can say, "That way, we won't have to tell your wife/boss/colleagues what you were watching last Saturday night while the wife was over at her mother's.")

Blackmail is an old espionage recruitment stunt. up there with, if not more powerful than, bribery and threats of physical harm. And then, do it just once and your theirs for life, or until they decide to throw you under a bus.

Happy watching, fellas!

Very crankily yours,
The New York Crank