Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Monday, September 9, 2013

What We Have Here Is: Failure to Communicate; Caturday Edition

Jake was going into and out of the litterbox this morning. He was yowling when he was there. That's what he does when he is constipated, so I gave him a stool softener.*

A bit later, I went into the laundry/utility room where I keep his litterbox. He had torn apart my stack of recyclables and scattered the collection of plastic bags.**

At that point, it was clear that he was protesting the condition of the litterbox, in that the level was too low for his sensibilities. I added litter. Jake stopped complaining.

George (peace be upon him) would have just shit next to the litterbox to signal his displeasure.
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* Understand that "giving" in this context means "grab the cat and shove a capsule down his throat."

** I take those back to the store for recycling.

2 comments:

Eck! said...

People say cats can't communicate.

Hummph! All to often if we listen we hear. When we don't we see and smell.
The price for inattention is noticeable.


Eck! pwnd by a cat.

Anonymous said...

Do cats ever communicate! Decades ago a woman moved in with me and her two cats. One of them did not approve. He crapped on my pillow to express his displeasure. He was scolded for that. He understood, and never did it again. Instead, a few nights later, while I was asleep in bed, he peed on me.

The problem was finally cured when I became the sole person to feed the cats. (The other cat had no problem with me and in fact, became my pal.) The pooping-peeing cat got the message: never crap where you eat. Or some variation of that.

And anybody wonders why I prefer dogs?