Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Ick. Ick. Ick., Criminal Law Edition

More than two years after witnesses claimed Luke Chrisco emerged from a portable toilet at a yoga festival covered in feces, the alleged Boulder "potty peeper" pleaded guilty today to two counts of burglary and attempted unlawful sexual contact.
I have no idea how much they paid the cop who first collared him, but it assuredly was not enough.

5 comments:

Nangleator said...

Attempted unlawful sexual contact?

"Hey, you've got a little... Let me get that for you..."

bearsense said...

Burglary ???
I remember the case, but I'd never have figured that.

Comrade Misfit said...

He illegally entered a building with the intent of committing a crime therein. That's pretty much the legal definition of burglary.

Peeping is illegal, so.....

bearsense said...

Thanks CEB - you're the lawyer.
It is pretty amazing that a porta-potty would be considered a "building," eh ?

Comrade Misfit said...

Wasn't just the pora-potties. One of the stories said that he had gone into some buildings and made peepholes in the bathrooms.