Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Friday, March 9, 2012

Hey, Mitt, Maybe Your NASCAR Team-Owning Buddies Will Give You a Rebel Flag to Pin Up In Your Garage!

Mitt Romney got in touch with his inner Southerner on Thursday during a campaign stop in the heart of Mississippi, telling a crowd of supporters he was "learning to say 'y'all' " and developing a taste for grits.

After accepting Mississippi Gov. Phil Bryant's endorsement, Romney turned his attention to his bodyguard, Garrett Jackson — a Mississippi native — whom he credits for his transformation into an "unofficial Southerner."

"He is now turning me into an, I don't know, an unofficial Southerner," Romney said. "And I'm learning to say 'y'all' and I like grits. Strange things are happening to me."
Rmoney has to seriously think that most Southerners flunked out around fifth grade if he thinks that people are going to buy this swill.

There's a fine line between "pandering' and "patronizing" and it seems to me that ol' Willard has tromped over it with both of his handmade-loafer-shod feet.

3 comments:

Mule Breath said...

Unfortunately there are a large number of southerners who actually did flunk fifth grade... and most of them have been elected to the state legislatures.

Not all of us though.

The New York Crank said...

My question is, are the trees the right height in Mississippi?

Yours crankily,
The New York Crank

Comrade Misfit said...

I would think that signs reading "mitt, Are Our Trees the Right height?" should appear at all of his rallies.