Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Pink Salt?

So there's this stuff called "Himalayan Sea Salt", which is pink and was deposited 250 million years ago, which would have been before dinosaurs were tromping about.

This is the back of a package:


With it being that old, ne might expect more than a few years in the "sell by" date.

What's with this stuff that makes it better than regular sea salt? Other than the presence of rust (which is why it's pink)?

3 comments:

The New York Crank said...

It's called "Marketing."

It works like this:

"Himalayan sea salt? How is that possible? The Himalayas ar far from and high above the sea."

"This salt dates back to when they weren't. Before some geological event or other pushed some mountains out of the sea and sank others into it."

"So okay. There's sea salt in the mountains. So who cares?"

"Our job is to make people care. We tell people it's ancient, it's very rare, it's pink, and it's imported. All of which is true."

"So I still don't get it. Why should anybody care?"

"Because they'll fill in benefits that we'd go to jail for if we tried to claim them.. You know: Himalayas equal Zen.Zen equals peace of mind and contentment. Dali Lama. Good Karma. Reincarnation and all that. Must be much healthier than regular salt. Which all adds up to... something or other. Anyway, we can then charge a hell of a lot more for it than regular salt."

"And people will buy this?"

"They buy Donald Trump, don't they?"

Yours very crankily,
The New York Crank

Expatriate Owl said...

Maybe dinosaur piss has something to do with the color.

Joe said...

I'm just glad they got it into the stores in time. That was cutting it really close!