Just an Earth-Bound Misfit: The Rantings of an Aging, Armed, Pinko Chick

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Spotting the Species Boobus Asshatus

They are a delicate, self-important and overblown species whose members cannot readily tolerate being outdoors or having to take more than a dozen steps to their fucking SUVs.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...: But they're important. They need to park that close!

Meanwhile, the grannie parked in a handicap space has to weave in/through/around these assholes.; 2/07/2010 10:26 AM
deadstick said...: I like the ones who buy a load of gardening stuff and have it delivered so they don't get their Range Rover dirty...; 2/07/2010 11:50 AM
Comrade Misfit said...: CP, exactly right. The handicapped spaces are in the parking lot across the driveway. Sometimes those worthless sacks of self-important sputum park right in front of the door.

This morning, I drove to the convenience store/gas station to get a paper. There was a Caddy which had been parked right out front by some asshat and, to add insult to the offense, the car was six feet away from the curb.

In a just world, it would be considered to be justifiable to beat such people with a tire iron.; 2/07/2010 12:26 PM
Marc said...: Thus, my time spent playing 'Car Wars' during my youth is paid off by imagining what protection they may have, and what armament I'd have added to my car to counter it, and quickly remove them from play...; 2/07/2010 2:41 PM
BadTux said...: Too bad we are now responsible adults and can't get away with keying the word "asshole" into asshole's cars. Siiigh!

- Badtux the Hooligan Penguin; 2/08/2010 6:46 PM
Comrade Misfit said...: Yes, but a shopping cart could sort of accidentally slam into their SUVs...; 2/08/2010 6:49 PM