If You Are Stupid Enough to Give Musk Access to Your Money….

...then you deserve what happens to it. And to you.

X Money, a core part of Elon Musk’s mission to turn X into an “everything app,” is rolling out starting today, 9to5Mac reports.

X/GriftCash isn't insured by the FDIC, so if it craters, "depositors" lose everything. But Musk will walk away with a hefty payout, you can bet your bottom dollar on that.

Mark Zuckerberg is an Evil Penis-Gobbler and Further Proof That Most Billionaires Are Scum-Sucking Parasites.

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Epstein's Border Patrol

He was chummy with some Border Patrol officers in St. Thomas. He got preclearance for flights and cultivated contacts to smooth over difficulties with other officers.

Billionaires really do think that law is beneath them.

Paying Your Taxes This Season?

Big Trumpy companies like Tesla and Palantir pay nothing.

Billionaires, on a percentage basis, mostly pay dogshit in taxes.

And they give nothing back:

On a percentage basis, I'll bet that most readers of this blog have given more to charity over 2025 than Musk has given in his fucking life. And you, Gentle Reader, didn't give to a self-serving personal foundation, like Musk likely does (and Trump did).

Epstein

The DoJ has also been improperly redacting documents to protect Trump and other well-off assholes. But that's no surprise, the Trump/Bondi DoJ has always been about protecting the elites from the fallout from Epstein. She did the same when she was attorney general of Florida.

The Trump Legal Department is not at all interested in determining who was raping kids. Their sole focus is protecting Epstein's and Trump's friends.

All around the world, people in other countries are paying a price for consorting with Epstein. In this country, because Epstein's best friend is in the White House, it's basically crickets.

Let me make this clear: I don't give a shit who was involved, Trump, Nutlick, Clinton, Musk, Gates or the Pope. If anyone was involved in trafficking and raping kids as young as nine years old, they should be stood in front of a firing squad and shot on live TV.

Deny and Delay

Watch this story about how health insurance companies, particularly United HealthCare, fucks over people:

And if that doesn't make you want to chip into the Luigi Mangione legal defense fund, you might want to ask why that's so.

CBS: Who Needs Standards?

That's the viewpoint of CBS News's new boss.

There are growing concerns within CBS News that Bari Weiss could gut or even disband the network’s Standards and Practices team, with multiple sources telling The Independent that the new editor-in-chief has complained that the unit has “too much power” and she doesn’t see the point of keeping it around.
...
“The team is responsible for ensuring editorial standards are met on scripts and provides daily reporting guidance. They literally uphold journalistic standards,” one CBS News reporter said, adding that it would be “crazy” for the network to dissolve Standards and Practices.
...
“I’ve been hearing that standards will be eliminated or severely cut back. Bari has told people that she wants to get rid of standards and is shocked that they have so much power. She also asked openly, ‘What’s the point of standards?’” one CBS News insider claimed.

Weiss is on a quest to transform CBS from "the Tiffany network" to "the cracked plastic cup that a hobo fished out of a dumpster network". She wants to change CBS to Fox News 2.0, a news network that serves, not the American people, but the oligarchs and Donald Trump. But since CBS is now owned by an oligarch, that's to be expected.

There are plenty of other news sources, which you should think of pursuing.

A Drop in the Bucket and Corporate Welfare (Updated with OpenAI Losses)

Wal-Mart is donating $500K to food banks. They have 4,600 stores, so they're donating less than $110 per store.

They are seriously cheap fucks. Brookshire Grocery, which has about 200 stores, is donating half a million.

If you donated a load of groceries to a food bank, the chances are that you, proportionately, did more to help people needing food than did Wal-Mart.

Keep in mind that SNAP, the ACA and Medicare work also as subsidies to labor exploiters like Wal-Mart, which thereby don't need to pay a living wage to their workers.

Meanwhile, OpenAI, which is backed by billionaires and large tech giants, wants the government to back their loans, so they will have nothing at risk. (OpenAI lost about $12 billion last quarter.)

Sam Altman read the room and realized that asking for a few hundred billion in loan guarantees wasn't a good sell when tens of millions of Americans are going hungry, so he walked that back.

For now. Corporations and oligarchs always seem to want the government to guarantee their shit, while deriding those at the bottom of the economic pyramid. Socialism for the rich, same as it ever was.

Karma's a Motherfucking Bitch; Tesla Ed.

Billionaire Elon Musk’s electric vehicle company Tesla rejected a $60 million settlement proposal in a lawsuit over the 2019 fatal crash of an Autopilot-equipped Model S before a jury this month awarded a $243 million verdict in the case.

Lawyers for the plaintiffs disclosed the settlement proposal in a filing, opens new tab on Monday in the federal court in Miami, Florida, as part of a request for legal fees from Tesla.

Cry me a fucking river, Elon. For you just have to know that he personally kiboshed a settlement.

You Can Buy a Stake in a Buggy-Whip Factory!

The Los Angeles Times newspaper plans to go public within the next year, its owner Patrick Soon-Shiong said in a television interview, aiming to give the public ownership of the 143-year-old publication.

"We're literally going to take LA Times public and allow it to be democratized and allow the public to have ownership of this paper," Soon-Shiong said on "The Daily Show" in a taped interview with the host, Jon Stewart, on Monday.

The shitbird billionaire who owns the LAT has pretty much run it into the ground, gutting the newsroom and shifting the paper towards being a propaganda organ for the billionaires' project of turning the country into a autocracy. So now he's setting up an arrangement where the other billionaires and hedge fund pirates can control what's in the paper.

Which means that they'll be pouring more and more money into the paper as the subscriber base disappears.

In other "Oligarchs Control the News" news, Bezos may buy CNBC.

CBS News to Hire a Zampolit

Skydance has told the Federal Communications Commission that once its acquisition of Paramount Global is complete, it will initiate a “comprehensive review” of CBS to ensure that the network is operating in the public interest, and that it will hire an ombudsman that will report directly to the president of CBS News and “who will receive and evaluate any complaints of bias or other concerns” at the news division.

In short, they will hire a political officer to ensure that nothing goes on the air at CBS News that will annoy the Aged Orange Toddler. "The public interest", in this case means "Trump's interest."

The oligarchs are going to ensure that nothing airs that will upset their scheme of having an autocracy that serves their interests.

If you are a journalist at CBS News, your certification as a gutless quisling will be sent in the mail.

Bezos Bends His Knee, Again

The White House took aggressive aim at Amazon, with President Donald Trump putting in a call to Amazon founder Jeff Bezos Tuesday morning, after the company considered displaying the added cost of tariffs on certain items.

Trump called Bezos to complain about reports that Amazon was considering displaying the cost of US tariffs next to prices for certain products on the company's website, two senior White House officials told CNN. Trump later said it was a "good call."

"Jeff Bezos was very nice. He was terrific," Trump told reporters on Tuesday. "He solved the problem very quickly. Good guy."

Some really quick (and cowardly) knee-bending there, Jeffy. Even the Wall Street Journal was not amused.

Ah, the Irony

OpenAI is complaining that DeepSeek stole all of the data from OpenAI that OpenAI stole from everyone else.

No wonder Sam Altman wants to hang around with the bloated Felon: They're both thieves without a shred of self-awareness.

Private Equity Firms are Criminals and Should be Outlawed

Here's another case in point: A private equity firm jacked up the price of fire trucks.

Private equity firms and funds are nothing but amoral vultures and pirates. Maybe after we get through the next four years, we can have a correction and start doing something about these thieves.

Maybe involving the use of tumbrels?

WaPo's Going to Play Fast and Loose With the Facts

After [the Orange Shitbird] entered the White House in 2017, The Washington Post adopted a slogan that underscored the newspaper’s traditional role as a government watchdog: “Democracy Dies in Darkness.”

This week, as [the Felon] prepares to re-enter the White House, the newspaper debuted a mission statement that evokes a more expansive view of The Post’s journalism, without death or darkness: “Riveting Storytelling for All of America.”

There's an age-old saying of "never let the facts get in the way of telling a good story". Who are "riveting storytellers"-- Alistair MacLean, Frederick Forsythe, J.D. Rowling, Stephen King, etc. They all write fiction. Even those who have written popular histories have been accused of playing fast and loose with the facts in service of a good story. William Randolph Hearst never let the facts get in the way of a good story. Neither does Rupert Murdoch.

In short, the downhill slide of the WaPo continues unchecked.

The CEO and Majority Shareholder of Facebook is a Major-League, Whiny-Ass Pussy

Zuckerberg has been leaning into the pro-masculinity and pro-white-bigotry movements of the Trumpies.

So who does he blame for FB's DEI policies that the fascists hate? Not himself, of course, for he's only the boss and owner. Nosiree bob!

He's blaming Sheryl Sandberg, who left over two years ago.

That's a real masculine move to blame a woman who is long gone for his current problems.

What a fucking pussy. He owns the store, he could have changed things at any time and on a whim. But no, it's someone else's fault, isn't it.

Zuckerberg is the Frank Burns of the tech world.

Bezos and the Streisand Effect

I'm going to bet that this cartoon by Ann Telnaes is getting far wider circulation than it would have if his birdcage-liner of a paper had just printed it without a fuss.

ETA: Her fellow cartoonists have stepped up.

Bezos Finds Another Way to Suck Up

By greenlighting a biopic about a mediocre fashion model from Communist Eastern Europe who married a wealthy American sexual predator.
Harry Turtledove has a casting suggestion for the lead role:

WaPo Proves It's Subservient to the Felonious Orange Shitbag

Ann Telnaes was a Pulitzer Prize winning editorial cartoonist for the Washington Post. She submitted his cartoon about billionaires paying tribute to the Felonious Orange Shitbag (FOS):

The Post killed the cartoon. She quit and explained why:

"I've worked for the Washington Post since 2008 as an editorial cartoonist. I have had editorial feedback and productive conversations-and some differences-about cartoons I have submitted for publication, but in all that time I've never had a cartoon killed because of who or what I chose to aim my pen at. Until now.

"The cartoon that was killed criticizes the billionaire tech and media chief executives who have been doing their best to curry favor with incoming President-elect Trump. There have been multiple articles recently about these men with lucrative government contracts and an interest in eliminating regulations making their way to Mar-a-lago. The group in the cartoon included Mark Zuckerberg/Facebook & Meta founder and CEO, Sam Altman/AI CEO, Patrick Soon-Shiong/LA Times publisher, the Walt Disney Company/ABC News, and Jeff Bezos/Washington Post owner."

Thiis is her Substack post, which seems to be back online. But anyway, I don't believe that Bezos directly nixed the printing of the cartoon. But I do believe that he has made his desire known that the Post should do everything it can to make nice with the FOS in the hopes that said FOS doesn't fuck with Amazon's computing contracts and with Bezos's pet rocket enterprise.

That's how it works in authoritarian states: The dictator/tyrant doesn't have to lift a finger. Corporate and media bosses comply without a smidgen of coercion out of fear of omething bad happening to them. It's like in the old days, when the beat cop stood there, tapping his nightstick into the palm of his hand. He didn't have to make a threat, but you knew what was what.

And so do the oligarchs. The million-dollar docations to FOS's inaugural fund is nothing less than unsolicited tribute. So is going down to FL to kiss the FOS's ring at Bed Bugs and Beyond.

Our option in response is to not buy that paper. Or not buy shit from Amazon. There's pretty much nothing but second-rate garbage these days on his streaming channel.

Shorter Amazon: Fuck You and Your Injuries, Get Back to Work

A woman who was hit by the New Orleans Terror Truck and then shot in the foot was denied a leave of absence by the Amazon warehouse where she works.

Those billions Bezos has don't get added to by themselves.