Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

The Doghouse

Yes, I know it's ultimately a commercial for somebody (which is why I didn't go to the site mentioned at the end).

But it is very funny (and if you are a guy, take it as a warning this holiday season).

Posted by on or about 09:36

5 comments:

BadTux said...

Okay, I can see why the vacuum cleaner would be insulting. It sez that the woman is the only one who is supposed to vacuum (not that this is untrue in reality, reality is that us guys are just fine with a half inch of cat fur, cat barf, kibble fragments, toenail clippings, random dirt, etc. on our carpets and bother vacuuming only when someone comes over to visit), and the tummy exerciser is pretty obvious too (it says you value her appearance more than her brains). But the rest, I'm trying to get this straight. You're saying that the perfect gift must be a) desired by the woman, but b) not needed by the woman? Because if it was needed by the woman and you did not get it before now but rather waited to give it to her as a gift on a special date, then obviously you're a boor and beneath contempt? This bachelor is confused!

- Badtux the Bachelor Penguin

12/17/2008 8:16 PM
Comrade Misfit said...

You are not confused, Dual-Bag, you have it exactly right. You're not supposed to give someone a gift of something they need. You're supposed to find something that the recipient wants or might want if she had thought about it.

But "need?" You might as well give a cart full of next week's groceries.

And, unless you have express permission and you confirm that, never ever give household appliances.

12/17/2008 10:10 PM
Dan brock said...

Am I golden or what?
I just got the Sweet Baby a...
Fifth of Black Jack and two little mini-bottles of Drambuie.
She got me a pneumatic stapler.
She is wife #4, so this knowledge isn't "as issued".

12/17/2008 10:47 PM
Comrade Misfit said...

OHP, who says guys are not trainable?

:)

12/18/2008 6:32 AM
Mark said...

I don't know whether to be angry over the rampant sexism of the advert, painting all blokes as thoughtless bastards, or just quietly pleased that I'm not one.

Then again, for our tenth anniversary my other half asked for a Nintendo DS Lite, specifically a black one. So maybe me being lucky plays a part, too.

12/18/2008 8:29 AM

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