Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Friday, December 20, 2013

Dear "Foley Artists":

Can you guys at least try to strive for a tad bit of realism when you add the sounds for firearms?

Not every fucking gun in the world has an external hammer that a shooter has to cock before firing.

Not every goddamned gun is going to make four clicks, like a motherfucking Colt Peacemaker. In Mob City, it was a M-1 carbine that clicked like a Colt single-action revolver. In other movies and TV shows, you hear Glocks and 1911s clicking like a cowboy's sidearm. It's stupid and it's annoying as all shit to anyone who has ever handled a firearm. Which is about several tens of millions of Americans.

But no! To you guys, they all sound like 1873 Colts.

Jesus! It's as dumb as if they had the sound of radial engines accompanying the starting of a 747's engines.

(Followup to this post)

Update: In the second third of Mob City, they had killers firing silenced revolvers. So it's not just Foley artists who are idiots, it's the prop masters. And the writers, for Kodak introduced 35mm Tri-X film after the Korean War. Oh, and I doubt if "dropping a dime" was a common phrase in 1947, when local phone calls cost a nickel (ie, "it's your nickel" for "you started this discussion".)

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm also a big fan of the "fishing reel cast" sound when someone spins the cylinder of a revolver. Oh, and the sweet little "phewt!" of "silenced" firearms (should be more like "tha-whack-a!"), or even better, when they put a silencer on a revolver.

And finally... nobody in Hollywood seems to think that using the stock on a sub-gun, or the rifle sling on an automatic rifle is necessary. Rambo himself left his AK sling hanging like a wet clothesline under the rifle.

Eck! said...

Well the round engine sound did work rather well in "Airplane"


Eck!

Sarah said...

Ah, well Foley artists are not known for being creative.

Wilhelm Scream

w3ski said...

As a mechanic, I noticed long ago that the sound a car makes when starting on TV is not necessarily the right car. Chrysler products up till the early/mid 80's had a unique starter motor. When TV played that sound for starting a Ford or a Chevy, you knew the sound man was a doofus.
w3ski

Comrade Misfit said...

The Foley folk claim that what they do is add "realistic" sounds to the films. But they don't seem to be too big on the "realistic" part. Every rifle fired has to have that echo sound, even if it's fired on a flat prairie or the desert.

Nangleator said...

Sarah, I'm furious every time I hear the Wilhelm Scream. The Red Tail Hawk also drives me wild, but its use seems to be dwindling.

When special forces teams sound like over-eager pots and pans salesmen, it gives me a smile, knowing how careful they are about being quiet, at need.

And how about even the appearance of a knife or sword making those schwinggg noises? Even when drawn from a leather scabbard. Or just picked up.