Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

I "Club" UPS

You may have seen the UPS logo that "they love logistics."


Well, I don't love UPS. I have something coming that was designated by the shipper as "adult signature required." All UPS will say is to expect delivery "by the end of the day", which is to say, anytime between 8:30AM and 5PM. And FSM help me if I happen to be in the bathroom when the Brown Pervert-Wagon* comes by.

In this day of computer tracking of everything that UPS does, one would think that they could give a better delivery estimate than "sometime during daylight." Even ComBastards Comcast and Verizon do better than that, nowadays.
_______________________________________
* Really. Is there any more fitting job for a burglary scout or a sex offender than a delivery driver?

2 comments:

Fixer said...

My UPS idiot here doesn't even ring the bell, even if he needs a sig. Just dumps it on the front porch and splits. Thankfully, the dogs get all stoopit crazy when someone comes up the walk so I know to check, but a couple times when no one was home, me or the wife came back to find packages sitting there. Asshole.

Fixer said...

I'll add that my mailman, when we're not home and has a package too big to fit in the mailbox, brings it to the back door and leaves a note in the box with the other mail. Good man, he.