Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Memo to Wal-Mart: Tell Your Top Executives to Get Ready for Prison

The Sunday NY Times ran a seriously long story about how Wal-Mart got to be the largest retailer in Mexico by the old-fashioned way:  Bribing the shit out of everyone.  Of note is the point when some people at Wal-Mart's HQ became uncomfortable with things, the brass asked a Wal-Mart lawyer to investigate the allegations.

The lawyer was the same asshole who authorized paying the bribes.  Which is kind of like asking Capt. Renault to investigate gambling in Casablanca.



Don't worry, though. Wal-Mart will find some lower-level flunkies to take the Federal heat under the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act. Those fall guys will go to jail and Wal-Mart will, out of the goodness of their hearts, ensure that their families will not suffer.  And when they get out of stir, Wal-Mart will find good jobs for them.

Which is the same way that the Mafia used to do it.

2 comments:

NotClauswitz said...

And this is wrong, how? How are you gonna get anything done in a place like Mexico without bribes??? It's an institutional practice.
If they funneled half back to unions and they moved the right cut to Democrats none of this would be a problem. :-)

Comrade Misfit said...

The problem is a picky little law called the "Foreign Corrupt Practices Act" that forbids paying bribes. Which you would have known about if you had bothered to read the fucking post in the first place!