Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Sunday, June 23, 2019

How to Look Like You Served Time

Get a homemade tattoo. It's about as stupidly self-indulgent as it sounds.

2 comments:

tweell said...

Prison tats are usually better done. If they're in the professional quality range but look like the artist used Bic ink, then you have a winner.

k55f5r said...

I was working in a heavy equipment shop in the 90s, and after work one day as we were all washing up at the big circular sink in the locker room, one of the new apprentices asked a mechanic with "white power" swasticas, and other prision tats on his arms and back "Why did you get all of those ugly tattoos?"
The mechanic looked him in the eye and said "I did it to keep from getting ass-raped in prision". The apprentice blushed and left the room, then everyone that was there for the exchange broke out laughing. We all knew that this guy was a genuine badass, and nobody was going to rape him without his consent - the tats were there because he was just a racist asshole.