Wishing on a Star, Explained

"When you wish upon a star, your dreams will come true."

According to Albert Einstein, nothing can travel faster than the speed of light. That would presumably include wishes, as well as the granting thereof.

Unless you live south of Tampa, the closest star that you can see without optics is Sirius, which is 8.6 light-years away. If you wish on Sirius today, expect your wish to come true in the second week of August, 2039. And that assumes that your wish is instantly processed upon arrival at Wish-Granting, Ltd. at Sirius.

South of Tampa. be sure to wish on the Alpha Centauri star system (two bright stars and one dim star). They're half the distance, so your wish should come true in December, 2030.

Be careful not to wish on Arcturus, unless you're very young, as your wish won't come true until August, 2094. And down south, if you wish on Canopus instead of Alpha Centauri, your wish will come true in 2822 (plus or minus 20 years, as if that'll matter very much).

So, the next time you run across Jiminy Cricket, you might consider stomping on him.

Because he's not helping.