Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Monday, December 22, 2014

The TSA Doesn't Like It When You Bring Honey to Your Honey on an Airplane

Packing this:


Will get you this:


I had two jars of the stuff in ziplock bags (in case of breakage), wrapped up in bubble warp and packed away inside my suitcase. They're gifts for friends who have tried the maker's stuff before and pronounced it as excellent.

When I opened my suitcase, I found the TSA card. They slit the wrappings, probably so they could swab the jars for residue or something like that. As far as I can tell, they didn't sample the contents. A little bit of googling revealed comments by other people that packing jars of honey in one's checked baggage will result in a luggage search by the TSA.

7 comments:

CenterPuke88 said...

Probably worried it might have been produced by Africanized bees, what with Boko Haram and all that.

Yogi said...

We took several pounds of mozzarella (vacuum sealed and wrapped in towels with freezer packs) to Oregon from California at Thanksgiving. Got the same treatment. I asked about it on the way home to LA, and was told that quantities of organic material look very similar to C-4 and such, and so are inspected. I asked, "if you're concerned that it might be C-4, why the fuck would you open it?" The answer was that they're not actually concerned that it iS C-4, but that they want to see what resembles it. Hmmmm.

Chuck Pergiel said...

We get those cards occasionally. Never noticed any connection to what was in the suitcase though.

Old NFO said...

Yep, binaries... Just sayin...

Joe said...

Actually, Yogi, that's good probabilistic reasoning. The machine said it might be C-4, but their prior information is that almost nothing in bags is C-4, so open it up and check.

I used to leave notes for the TSA. Like, "If you find my wire cutters, could you put them in the side zipper pocket? kthxbye!

Wraith said...

Security Theatre. "A lot of sound and fury, and signifying nothing."

BOB PAGE said...

Had the same thing recently with a couple jars of peanut butter for my son in France... they were tied up in the plastic grocery bag they left the store in, which had been torn into, but the jars themselves were unopened. I sort of expected them to be given a closer look so wasn't surprised to see the slip when we got to Europe. I've gotten the inspection notice slips on other trips before (both domestic and international) but hadn't packed anything on those that I thought would attract any attention. I have given some thought to keeping the slips and placing one on the top layer every time I pack a bag just to screw with TSA, but I also figure that they are quite capable of screwing me back tenfold, so I haven't mustered the stones to do that just yet.