Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Thursday, January 15, 2009

DBP: Stating the Obvious Since 2002


As you may know, a USAir flight apparently had both engines shelled by a flock of geese. The pilots ditched the airplane in the Hudson River; no serious injuries, nobody killed.

However, from the Department of Really Stupid Press Statements:
The crash of a U.S. Airways passenger jet into the Hudson River off New York City on Thursday was not terrorism related, U.S. security officials said.

"There is no information at this time to indicate that this is a security-related incident," said Department of Homeland Security spokeswoman Laura Keehner. "We continue to closely monitor the situation, which at present is focused on search and rescue."
That statement from the DBP merits a real "no shit, Sherlock" response. Unless al Qaeda has developed the capability to recruit geese and train them to fly into the engines of airliners, what sort of moron would even think to make that sort of statement? If it was in response to a question, what sort of brain-damaged imbecile would think to ask that question?

(I forgot. Sammie the plumber Wizzlebeak is now a war reporter).

Landing a jetliner on the water is a really rare event. The two pilots on that flight earned their pay for the year.

5 comments:

BadTux said...

Crap, those two pilots just earned their salaries for the rest of their lives. What they did is virtually impossible, sort of like taking a 4 door Jeep Wrangler Unlimited up Isham Canyon (another case where I saw something impossible done by someone with skills beyond those of mere mortals). Land a jet with *two* bird strike engine outs, on water, with the plane intact at the end, without even a bruise on any passenger? Pshaw. I wouldn't believe it if it hadn't happened.


(verification word: "flyties". How appropriate!)

Mark said...

What really *REALLY* fucks me off is that I just *KNOW* there are gonna be a dozen headlines saying it was "a miracle" that nobody was hurt. It wasn't a miracle you twatbastards, it was virtuoso flying, the product of arduous training and superior skills. Don't attribute to your invisible friend what should be pinned as a gong to those pilots' chests.

Word verification: yobases.

They belong to us.

Bridget Magnus said...

And we are once more saved from the scourge of terror-geese from north of our borders. Rather than cells, these terror-geese run in flocks and show their colors in the form of menacing v-shaped formations. They also communicate to other "flocks" and among themselves with what sounds remarkably like bicycle horns. The fiends! The anti-terror-goose fence clearly isn't tall enough.

Verification word, ardedi. I wonder if it means anything whatsoever.

willis said...

Birds can bring `em down. I recall an incident with an ATR42 the hit a flock of geese on approach and it tore that aircraft up. The birds punched holes in the wing to fuselage fairings, the radome and the Main gear fairings. The aircraft was down for almost 3 weeks for repairs. I've seen smaller birds (hard to tell what they are from the pieces) heavily dent nose and leading edge structure on jets and large turboprops.

These guys (the pilots) did a great job bring this aircraft in, "dead stick" if that's the way it happened. They must have had little time to react and ditch the aircraft perfectly. It looks text book...just check a briefing card next time you fly for a picture like it. You won't see it often!

Karen Zipdrive said...

Yeah, well, all that pilotty talk is one thang, but I think the President Bush, which he stil is by the way, should look into them al quida geese them Candanians is training for the terorists.
The presnident didnt mention it in his winsome speach last nite because he Knew something was up. I bet.