Words of Advice:

"Never Feel Sorry For Anyone Who Owns an Airplane."-- Tina Marie

If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

Flying the Airplane is More Important than Radioing Your Plight to a Person on the Ground
Who is Incapable of Understanding or Doing Anything About It.
" -- Unknown

"There seems to be almost no problem that Congress cannot,
by diligent efforts and careful legislative drafting, make ten times worse.
" -- Me

"What the hell is an `Aluminum Falcon'?" -- Emperor Palpatine

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

Tuesday, November 13, 2012


No coffee??!!!1!!??
Forget about super-sizing into the trenta a few years from now: Starbucks is warning of a threat to world coffee supply because of climate change. ... The company is now preparing for the possibility of a serious threat to global supplies.
Now, if the only threat was to that bitter burnt shit that Starbucks sells, I'd not care. But obviously, Seattle Swill is made by the company and has little to do with the actual coffee beans.

Can it get worse? You betcha! No chocolate!!
It looks as though climate change is going to take a bite out of chocolate production, according to a new study by scientists at CIAT. ... The cocoa report predicts a one-degree Celsius temperature rise by 2030, increasing to 2.3 degrees Celsius by 2050. This is enough to inhibit the development of cocoa pods, which could send yields crashing and prices soaring.
If this happens, you might not want to live to see it, especially if you were a climate-change denier. You could wind up hanging from a lamp-post.



montag said...

By the time coffee trees are gone, they will have genetically modified huckleberry bushes to take their place. Or maybe mooseberry bushes even.

Old NFO said...

Lemme see, so by 2070 it 'might' be an issue??? I'll be long gone :-)

Comrade Misfit said...

I plan to live long enough for the nanobot rejuvenation therapies to be perfected, so I plan to be around to be able to kvetch about $500/lb coffee.

Roberta X said...

So start growing coffee and chocolate farther north!

The New York Crank said...

Hey Montag,

By 2030 genetically-altered coffee won't be an issue any more, since genetically-modified people will be able to stay awake just by pouring chicken fat into their own bellybuttons.

Crankily yours,
The New York Crank