Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Monday, June 1, 2009

No. Fucking. Shit!

song chart memes
see more Funny Graphs

I had to go down to Federal court last week (don't ask) and a nominally 35 minute trip took over an hour because there were four Things To Look At over on the side of the road (two accidents where cars were pulled off the road, one cop stop of a motorist and one work crew), none of which had anything to do with the lanes on the highway.

But the fucktard drivers still all had to slow down and look. Two of them were on the other side of the damn highway. It's not as though those clowns all worked for Eyewitness News and had to call in a story about it, but they all slowed down so they could see what was going on, if anything.

They must come from some real hick town where nobody gets in an accident and Deputy Fife never gets to pull anyone over to write a ticket.

Morons.

5 comments:

Fixer said...

I have a 60 mile roud trip every day to work. The stupid shit I see is unbelievable. I've had what's usually a 35 minute trip take 2 1/2 hours because of Things To Look At (a Friday afternoon in the summer when every idiot was heading to the Hamptons). It was like bumper cars with the cops doing car poll lane enforcement at the same time.

Sarah said...

Sorry you had a frustrating drive. All it takes is ONE driver who taps the brakes, and the heavy traffic flow sloooows.

If you can detach from it a bit, it's actually kind of interesting. It's an example of a particle system showing wave-like behavior ( propagation speed and non-linearity ).

No, I get pissed off too. But it gives me something to think about.

SkinnyDennis said...

A corn maze gets planted every fall for Halloween next to a freeway near here (SF Bay Area) which is constantly backed up with lookers. You really can't see the actual maze itself, just a large field of, um... corn. I want to post a sign next to the freeway;
"IF YOU WANT TO SEE CORN GROW
PLEASE KEEP DRIVING UNTIL IOWA".
Idiots...

BadTux said...

Yeah, the Things To Look At folks are out in force here in the Bay Area for sure. Once I encountered one of these rolling roadblocks. After 15 minutes of slow traffic, I came to the Thing To Look At -- one of those lighted Caltrans freeway signs usually used to announce road construction ahead, that had a message on it "Happy Mother's Day" or something innocuous like that. Traffic swiftly sped up to normal speeds immediately after that sign. GAH! THE STOOPID, IT BURNS, IT BURNS!

- Badtux the Stupidity-observin' Penguin

lisahgolden said...

Every day. Every dang day. This is my drive.