Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Ya Gotta Be Shitting Me; Labelling Edition

My sister gave me a target-shooting game; it uses little darts to shoot at ping-pong balls that are floating on columns of air. The gun looks like this:


The box has this warning on it:

"IMPORTANT: any person who changes, alters, removes or obliterates any coloration or markings that are requirements by any applicable state of (sic) Federal U.S. Law or Regulation for any imitation firearm in any way making the imitation firearm look more like an actual is guilty of a misdemeanor. Also any display or brandishing of an imitation firearm in public which may cause confusion may be a crime."

Yep. Only in a Looney Tunes universe does this thing resemble a real gun.

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