Not a Product Endorsement

Orange bags for picking up dog shit.

I hope that they're real.

National Greed and Sloth Day

Yes, an ongoing rant.

Today has nothing to do with whose who died serving this country. It's all about starting the summer vacation season, a three-day holiday and, most importantly, enriching all sorts of retail and travel industries.

Fewer and Fewer People Want Teslers (as the FLOSS calls them)

Tesla told Austin workers on its Model Y and Cybertruck lines to stay home for the week of Memorial Day, three workers told Business Insider.

The break is unusually long, the workers said. Production lines were up and running during the same period last year, they said.
...
In April, Elon Musk's carmaker reported a 13% drop in deliveries year over year. During the first quarter, Tesla reported it produced nearly 26,000 more EVs than it delivered, even after a drop in production of nearly 100,000 vehicles compared with the previous quarter.

Whether or not EVs are a good thing and whether or not the WankerPanzer in particular deserves its repuation as an expensive piece of garbage, it's a shame that the workers are paying the price for Musk's successive decisions to become so identified with the brand and then to go on full Nazi with the FLOSS.

But it is what it is. One of the few ways that people have to openly show their disapproval of him is to not buy his shitty cars. And so they are.

The Geat Enshittification; Vacation Caution Ed.

Word is that a number of campgrounds and RV parks in Federal psrks will be closed this year becsuse Ketamine Karen fired the staff. Consequently, the cost of staying at commercial/private campgrounds maybe higher this year.

So check before you go.

Trump's Egg Surcharge

The soaring price of eggs has forced Waffle House to add a temporary surcharge on customers’ orders.

The Georgia-based chain is adding a 50-cent charge per egg because of the “nationwide rise in cost of eggs,” according to signs posted at its restaurants.

He said he'd do something about it, so maybe instead of polishing Elon's knob, he can turn his attention to doing something that benefits Americans.

Watch for the Upcoming Run on Consumer Goods

President-elect Donald Trump said Monday that he will issue executive orders imposing new tariffs on all imported goods from China, Mexico and Canada, the nation’s three largest trading partners, upon returning to the White House.

Once people realize that prices on almost everything will be going up, the rush to get shit while the getting's good will be on. If that happens, look for sales on stuff to go away.

And if anyone you know is a Trump voter or didn't vote and they complain about it, tell them "Toyota" if they're old or that now they're finding out if they're young.

You Have Enough Fucking Clothes.

Don't buy more. Remember the old maxim: Use it up, wear it out. Make it do or do without.

One tip from Buy Now! The Shopping Conspiracy is that if you want to buy something online, put it in your shopping cart and then leave it there for a month. If you still want it a month later, buy it.

The world is drowning in waste, a numerous stories about how recucling doesn't happen and how e-waste is dumped on fourth-world nations will tell you. Or how there is so much plastic in the ocean, the fish, the air and in us.

Most petrochemicals were developed within the lifetimes of people still living. And it has taken an amazingly short period of time for humans to pollute the globe with them.

We need to do better. But I have every confidence that we will not. A classic beginning bio experiment is to put a layr of nutrient-rich agar in a petrie dish, put in a drop of bacteria-laden water and incubate it. Bacterial colonies will grow and grow until they consume the nutriets and/or die fromt heir own waste. We are no different, we're just doing it with the fucking planet.

Which may be why Widdle Elon wants to go to Mars.

A Day of Greed and Sloth is All That Today Really Is

Memorial Day was once a day to remember those Americans who died in service of this nation. It was not meant to be a shopping extravaganza, a kickoff for summer vacations and a day for parties and other such bullshit.

But you know that in a capitalist society (or half-capitalist, since the airlines, banks and such all get rescued with government money when they get into trouble), greed is a cardinal virtue and anything that facilitates getting consumers to go more deeply into debt is a sacrement.

So, as I've ranted before, to satisfy the greedy fuckers, Memorial Day was changed from a somber day of reflection to a floating holiday to make for a longer weekend.

Every holder of a "Memorial Day Sale" should be regarded as a bottom-feeder who is enriching themselves from the memories of those who did the hard work of fighting and dying.

So, on this fake holiday, I say to you:

Spend Nothing!

Being on the Cutting Edge Can Mean That You're the One Who Bleeds

That's what a woman who bought a Fisker Ocean found out when minor damage to a door (a crease and a broken hinge) meant the car was totaled because parts weren't available.

And you can bet that the insurance premiums for such a vehicle are eye-watering.

Caveat emptor, people. Especially when you're out on the edge of things. My uneducated, untutored recommendation is that if you have to buy an EV, do so from a company that knows how to make vehicles. (Or, better yet, buy a plug-in hybrid.)

H/T

Now Your TV Will Give You Ads On Its Own

Walmart is buying Vizio so they can pipe ads directly to the viewers. Vizio TVs are cheaper because they directly feed ads to those who bought them.

Pro tip: If you buy a cheap big-ass TV, you are not the customer. You're the product.

If you're thinking about finding a good old 27" CRT TV, the shows nowadays are shot to be seen on big-ass LCD TVs.

You may have to spring for a non-cheap TV. Stay away from Vizio and any TV branded for a retailer. And then go research how to turn off tracking on your particular TV.

And remember this: Walmart's default settings are "evil" and "rapacious".

Remember, Football is Over

Like New Years Eve and St. Patrick's Day are drinking holidays for amateurs, the Super Bowl is a game for people who don't care about football. They're watching for the commercials (the most-hyped part of the game) and the halftime show.

Between Lowes and Home Depot, Stay Outta Home Depo

Home Depot is all "big brother" with facial recognition. Lowes isn't.

There are a lot of other stores on the list. Walgreens might be scanning your face, CVS isn't. I'd recomment avoiding the stores that are tracking your ugly mug.

H/T

They Must Think That Consumers Are Idiots

This is the product:

This is the warning label:

That's right! A can of peanuts might contain peanuts! A can of peanuts was filled by machinery that might have touched peanuts.

Who knew?

I'm sorry, but if you need to be told that a can of peanuts contains peanuts, etc., then you really should seek professional help.

Happy Thanksgiving

On a number of radio stations back in the day, playing the entire song was a Thanksgiving tradition. Some of them were commercial stations-- almost nineteen minutes of no commercials. And some of them played it twice, at noon and 3 PM.

The judge was really blind, he had a Seeing-Eye dog. He played himself in the movie (as did Officer Obie).

I hope that if you're in America, you and yours have a good Thanksgiving. Try not to punch out your racist uncle or your commie nephew.

And please, enjoy the day without resorting to rampant consumerism.

Or burning down your hostess's house.

And you can maintain peace at the table by dividing up the attendees.

(Yes, this is almost a complete repeat from earlier years. So sue me.)

Rivian Truck

The front of one, when the daytime lights are on, look like two toilet seats.

That's probably appropriate, as the company's flushing money. And they're pretty shitty.

The 2024 Hess Truck

RobertaX has the concept:

It's a Tesla Cybertruck in the style of the "Transformers" toys, only when you transform it, it's a dumpster, complete with flames shooting out the top!

Tesla also threatened to take legal action against any owner who sold one. That bullshit lasted about a day.

A neighbor of my sister bought a Tesla car and immediately parked it. They contacted Tesla for the title. Tesla said that they had about a month to get the title to them before the temporary tags expired and wanted to know what the rush was. The buyer said they were going to flip it and Tesla said they'd be on a list prohibiting them from buying a new one for the next year. They said they didn't care, they were making over ten grand on the deal. Even though the fit and finish of the car wouldn't have passed final inspection at the Yugo factory, somebody was willing to pay bank for one.

If you buy a Tesla, you're supporting a narcissitic troll with dreams of turning this country into an autocracy in service of the billionaire class. Think of his stuff as Nazi vehicles 2.0.

EVs Are Not Selling Well

Compared to internal combustion or hybrid cars, EVs are piling up on the lots.

Personally, I don't make a lot of long-distance drives anymore. My longest trip, these days, is to visit my mother in her nursing home three states away. Most EVs have the range to make the trip. But once I got there, there is no place to plug in and charge up. If I wanted to stop for lunch on the way, there's no place to charge a vehicle.

But there are plenty of gas stations. And pumping up a tankful of gas only takes a few minutes.

If You Run a Retail Business and You're Open Today: Go Fuck Yourself, You Greedy Bastid.

I get that some businesses should be open: Gas stations and 24-hour pharmacies, but not much else. This is supposed to be a day of celebration and reflection, not a day to go out and find a good deal on mattresses or shit like that there.

Imma Gonna Drive My Old Car `Til the Wheels Fall Offa It

BMW had one of the more forward-thinking concepts at CES. The i Vision Dee is a talking electric sedan with an artificial intelligence that BMW says “will go far beyond the level of voice control and driver assistance systems we are familiar with today.”

The name “Dee” stands for Digital Emotional Experience. One notable feature is an advanced head-up display that can display driver information on the full windshield at a base level and is capable of projecting virtual reality on the windshield. BMW says the AI can get excited when it sees you and can express its mood via screens on the front grille.

If that wasn’t enough, the i Vison Dee is covered in 240 e-ink panels, including the wheels, that allow it to shift colors at will. You can have a purple car one day and a checkerboard pattern the next.

I don't know about you, but if I want to have something that will get excited when it sees me, I'll get a fucking dog. I don't need to have a relationship with a goddamn machine.

A German car that talks to you? "Nein, nein, nein! Ve are not moving until you fasten your seatbelt" "Ach du lieber, you spilled your coffee ON MY CLEAN FLOOR! WIPE IT UP, NOW!!"

I imagine that the DMV and the cops are going to have conniption fits at the idea of having a car that can essentially repaint itself at will. Maybe it can be programmed to display messages, such as "use your blinker next time, asshole."

YMMV; EV Ed.

If you get one of the new electric F-150s, and if you plan on towing things, figure you'll have to stop to charge that thing up every two hours, or less.

Given the shorter range on those trucks, you'd think that the auto companies would come up with a body design that is a tad bit aerodynamic than a fucking billboard.

But what the hell do I know.

You could mount a generator in the bed, but it seems the folks at Found On Road, Dead have thought of that.