Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"Thou Shalt Get Sidetracked by Bullshit, Every Goddamned Time." -- The Ghoul

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck,
"FOFF" = Felonious Old Fat Fuck,
"COFF" = Convicted Old Felonious Fool,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset,
A/K/A P01135809, A/K/A Dementia Donnie, A/K/A Felon^34,
A/K/A Dolt-45, A/K/A Don Snoreleone

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

Bad Times at the El Royale

Bad Times at the El Royale: The movie can best be described as "imitation Tarantino", in that a Tarantino move would be steak and this flick would be a can of corned beef.

The plot is here.

The Atlantic calls it "inventive and indulgent". They got the second part right; somebody indulged the director when they greenlit this turd.

My recommendation: Save your money and the 3 hours of time (with previews) that you could put to good use by doing almost anything else. Even a nap would be a better use of your time. If I had a set of noise-canceling headphones with me, I'd have slept through it.

3 comments:

Harry Hamid said...

Oh wow. It wasn't a comic book movie and I couldn't figure out genre just from the ads, so I was considering it. Now I'll probably, yeah, not.

Deadstick said...

eb, I don't know why anybody goes to the movies any more: the home movie experience eclipsed the theater experience long ago. Consider:

Nice big screen
Comfy chair
Pause button
Convenient bathroom
Food at grocery store prices
Drinks at liquor store prices
No loudmouths
Your feet don't stick to the floor
If I can't stand the movie I can turn my chair around and screw around on the computer without spoiling SWMBO's fun
I'm the only one present who has a gun

Who needs it?

The New York Crank said...

I beg to disagree. I couldn't figure out for a millisecond where the plot was going to take me next. It was all great fun in a slightly-creepy, borderline scary, WTF's-going- on-here way. It was admittedly about 15 minutes too long, and not likely to provoke an evening of heavy-duty philosophical debate in America's undergraduate dormitories, but I found it a nice evening's entertainment.

What can I say? Some people like broccoli. For that matter, some people prefer Trump.

Yours crankily,
The New York Crank