Hopefully, You’ve Invested in Popcorn Futures

Donald Trump said Thursday he’s been indicted on charges of mishandling classified documents at his Florida estate, igniting a federal prosecution that is arguably the most perilous of multiple legal threats against the former president as he seeks to reclaim the White House.

The Justice Department did not immediately publicly confirm the indictment. But two people familiar with the matter who were not authorized to discuss it publicly said Trump’s team had been informed that he had been indicted on seven counts and that prosecutors had contacted lawyers to advise them of the indictment shortly before Trump announced it himself on his Truth Social platform.

Pass the popcorn, crack open the bubbly and strap in, folks.

Expect some unhinged behavior from the more loosely-wrapped Trumpanzees. Synagogues might want to batten down the hatches.