Friday, January 2, 2015

"Due to Increased Security Measures, Only Ticketed Passengers are Permitted Past Security Checkpoints"

Can we finally can that announcement? Those "increased security measures" have been in place for the last thirteen yeas. By now, they are "normal security measures."

It's become as ridiculous as giving everyone in the military the National Defense Medal, which after twenty-four years of wartime, is somewhat like giving a kid a gold star for showing up in class.

Let's just fucking sack up and admit that those "increased security measures" are never going to go away, just like the blue and green lights on the Stoplight of Death are never going to be lit.

Which reminds me, a shirttail nephew got deployed to one of our war zones recently. I suggested to him and his girlfriend that they stay cool on Skype, since the NSA has a track record of listening into the smutty phone calls of soldiers.

3 comments:

  1. Actually, the airlines couldn't be happier.

    Many years ago, before the metal detectors, I helped my grandfather board the plane to California by carrying his leg prosthesis up the wheeled staircase onto the plane, as he made his way up using his crutches. After the stewardess placed the prosthesis in the onboard baggage area, I helped Grandpop and Grandmom into their seats and then exited the plane.

    Nowadays, because only ticketed passengers can go past the TSA people, passengers with disabilities need to be helped by airline personnel. And eventually, the airlines will charge a fee for this service.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I mentally replace the word "security" with "control" on all airport announcements. Everything is clearer that way.

    ReplyDelete

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