Fashion Tips for the Clueless

This guy has some fashion tips. Some are absolutely priceless.

One is this, about Crocs:

"When I see people wearing Crocs, I know immediately that we have nothing in common, and that we could never be friends or have any meaningful kind of relationship. They come in every color imaginable yet look bad with every other article of clothing ever created. The only thing that goes with Crocs is social ostracism. To their credit, though, Crocs serve as an excellent idiot barometer..."

Ayup. As evidence that Crocs are a good idiot barometer, I offer these photos:


And not to be content with one fashion fuckup, His Douchebaggedness has to wear them with presidential socks:


The guy is right about another thing: Red lipstick makes you look like either a clown or a whore. I had a whole series of jobs where makeup was definitely not called for; makeup doesn't go so well when you are trying to troubleshoot a balky pump in a boiler room in the summer. So when I went for a makeover in law school, the woman doing it first made me over with bright red blush and bright red lipstick. I told her that unless she really thought that I was going to leave there and start blowing sailors down by the piers, she had better try again.

(H/T to Tam)